My Choice

At seven A.M., I don't envy the mob
Who rise, shine and shower and go to the job.
In rain, sleet or storm, whether snowing or blowing,
I stay home and savor the joys of not going.

Cheers to you dears out fulfilling yourselves.
I'll bake a nice cake, and I'll straighten my shelves,
I'll knit babe some socks and with the kids take a walk.
If my neighbor drops in, I'll have time for a talk.

I'd rather have a family than fortune or fame;
I don't think my apron's a Red Badge of Shame.
You're welcome to banking, computers and math,
Guns, plumbing and business. I'll take a hot bath!

Art, music, reading—the good things of life
Are no less my own, since I'm mother and wife.
If I scrub, mop or dig in the garden, I'm free...

Remember, the choices were all made by me.

-Helene Lewis Coffer, lightly adapted

"O son of Kunti, all that you do, all that you eat, all that you offer and give away, as well as all austerities that you may perform, should be done as an offering unto Me." -Bhagavad-gita As It Is 9.27

"A Kṛṣṇa conscious person is always dovetailed with the supreme desire, for he has no desire for personal sense gratification. He moves exactly like a part of a machine. As a machine part requires oiling and cleaning for maintenance, similarly, a Kṛṣṇa conscious man maintains himself by his work just to remain fit for action in the transcendental loving service of the Lord." -Bhagavad gita As It Is 4.21p

Crunchy Cauliflower Pakoras

Always a hit and-cooked in ghee- the best vegetarian substitute for fried chicken. Ghee-fried makes cauliflower pakoras a truly delicious choice for "animal food without slaughter."

INGREDIENTS:

• 3 c besan
• 1 T ground cumin
• 1 T ground coriander
• 1 T ground black pepper
• 3/4 t hing
• 1/2 T turmeric
• 1 T salt
• water
• ghee for deep frying
• cauliflower, chopped in nugget-sized flowerettes

PREPARATION:

1. Chop the cauliflower into nuggets for coating with batter.
2. Combine all dry ingredients.
3. Add water to make a semi thick batter
4. Before dipping the cauliflower into the batter, dip them into flour first. That way the batter will stick better to the vegetable. Then after dipping into the batter, deep fry in hot ghee until crispy on the outside and tender on the inside. They will be a deep browned color. Ideally, they are darker than the ones pictured. They'll be more tender.
5. Drain on a clean kitchen towel.

Offer to Krishna immediately, with a favorite chutney.

VARIATION: Gourmet friend Katelin recommends replacing the besan with rice flour and replacing the plain water with club soda. The result was a batch of pakoras with ultra crispness!

All Glories to Sri Nityananda Rama!

                   
A favorite song for offering Lord Nitai on His holy appearance day:

DALALERA GITA by Srila Bhaktivinoda Thakura
(1)
boro sukher khabor gāi
surabhi-kuñjete nāmer hāṭ khule’che (khoda nitāi)
(2)
boro mojār kathā tāy
śraddhā-mūlye śuddha-nāma sei hāṭete bikāy
(3)
jata bhakta-bṛnda basi’
adhikārī dekhe’ nāma becche daro kasi’
(4)
jadi nāma kinbe, bhāi
āmār sańge calo, mahājaner kāche jāi
(5)
tumi kinbe kṛṣṇa-nāma
dasturi loibo āmi, pūrṇa ha’be kāma
(6)
boro doyāl nityānanda
śraddhā-mātra lo’ye den parama-ānanda
(7)
ek-bār dekhle cakṣe jal
‘gaura’ bole’ nitāi den sakala sambal
(8)
den śuddha kṛṣṇa-śikṣā
jāti, dhana, vidyā, bala nā kore apekṣā
(9)
amani chāḍe māyā-jāl
gṛhe thāko, bane thāko, nā thāke jañjāl
(10)
ār nāiko kalir bhoy
ācaṇḍāle den nāma nitāi doyāmoy
(11)
bhaktivinoda ḍāki’ koy
nitāi-caraṇa binā ār nāhi āśroy

TRANSLATION
1) I am singing news of great happy tidings. Lord Nityananda Himself has opened a market-place of the Holy Name in Surabhi-Kunja.

2) The news of its great results is that He is selling the pure Holy Name in that market-place for the price of only one's faith.

3) Lord Nityananda, the proprietor of the market, seeing all the devotees become attracted, is selling them the Holy Name after bargaining with them.

4) O brother, if you want to buy the Holy Name, then go with me. We must go to the presence of that great soul, Nityananda.

5) You will buy the name of Krsna, I will take my commission and all of our desires will be fulfilled.

6) Lord Nityananda is greatly merciful. Taking only one's faith, He gives the highest ecstasy.

7) If Nitai sees only once tears in the eyes while chanting the name "Gaura", then He gives all resources to that person.

8) He gives the pure teachings of Krsna to everyone and does not care for one's birth, wealth, knowledge and strength.

9) Now, giving up the illusory snare of Maya, either remain in household life or in the forest as a sannyasi for no more troubles remain.

10) There is no more fear of the age of Kali. The merciful Nityananda gives the Holy Name to even the candalas.

11) Bhaktivinoda calls out: "Except for the lotus feet of Lord Nityananda there is no other shelter!"

pineapple chutney

 The general standard is a chutney that is "Too hot to eat, but too sweet to resist"!

INGREDIENTS:

• 1 medium-large ripe pineapple, washed, peeled, cored and chopped into bite-sized chunks
• 2-3 T ghee
• 1 T grated ginger
• 1 t cumin seeds 
• 1/2 t dried red chilis (or as desired)
• 1/2 t coriander powder
• 1/2 t fenugreek seeds
• 1/2 t turmeric
• 2/3-1 c firmly packed brown sugar (or turbinado sugar if preferred)

PREPARATION:
1. Heat the ghee in a saucepan and fry the cumin seeds and chilies until they brown. Add turmeric and pineapple chunks.
2. Stir-fry a few minutes. Cover and cook over a low- medium flame for 15-30 minutes, stirring occasionally.
3. Remove the cover. Mash a bit. Stir in the sugar and cook over a low flame until jam-like thickness. If in a hurry and there is  a lot of juice (especially if making a large quantity), I mix water into a little arrow root and stir into the hot mixture to thicken. It only takes a few minutes. Turn off the heat when desired thickness is attained.

Offer to Krishna with piping hot pakoras.

Handling a Difficult Man

Helpful advice from Helen B. Andelin:

What do I mean by a difficult man? It can mean many things but especially one who is impatient, irritable, angry, grumpy, stubborn, obstinate or just distant. In the 1980 TV movie series, “All in the Family,” Archie Bunker is a perfect example of a difficult man and his wife Edith handled him remarkably well. What are the...rules for handling such a difficult man? I recommend the following:

First, check into your own life...Do you have a smooth running home? Are things picked up around the house? Dinner on time? When dinner is unnecessarily late and he is increasingly hungry, it can bring out the worst in a man. Are you spending too much money? Too much time talking on the phone? And how are you treating him?... Do you build him, or trample on him? Are you nourishing his soul with appreciation and admiration, and filling his other masculine needs?...

Next, check into his life. Is he having problems in his work? Are his plans being frustrated? Is he overloaded with responsibility with no solution in sight? Under a strain? Is he working for a goal that is draining off his energy, his patience? Or is his life the opposite - dull and monotonous, passing him by with nothing to show for it? How is his health? Does he feel up to par physically? If any of the above applies you can help him immeasurably by being patient and understanding, by expressing sympathy for his problems and trust in his ability to solve problems or reach his goals. When a man’s life is difficult his wife has her best opportunity to prove her worth. She is more indispensable to his happiness.

And last, you may have to accept some of his obstinacy as inborn. Some men have thin nerves. Life is more difficult for them. So, accept his short tempered nature as a part of him and don’t try to change him into a sweet tempered man or you may be in for more trouble. He may not know how to change and this can frustrate him, trap his emotions and make him more ill tempered than ever. It has been observed by some that the higher a man’s goals the more short-tempered he is inclined to be. We have covered the three possible causes of a man’s difficult nature and the best way to deal with them. But, how should a woman react at the moment a man is difficult? The following are two positive methods...:

One way is to be feminine. Use a gentle approach. An old Christian Hymn reads, “You can speak a gentle word, to the heart with anger stirred.” It is a method of handling an irritable husband in a way that will disarm him so that his anger softens or even disappears.

An excellent example of this is the way in which Mrs. Carl Sandberg handled her husband, recorded in the book, A Great and Glorious Romance. The Sandberg’s daughter Helga writes of her parents, “There never were loud arguments back and forth in our house. My father raged and roared, and often. But it was one way. My mother coaxed him out of it. Once when he was very old I saw him pull at a door that was stuck. He rattled the handle and shouted. My mother, a small woman, looked up at him and patted his chest. “What a fine strong voice,” she said. Disarmed he stood there, in love. It was a thread established early, and woven through their life.”

The second and probably the best way to handle a difficult man, at the moment he is difficult, is to react (with)...teasing playfulness... The prime example I have given of this quality is Babbie from the novel The Little Minister by James Barrie. Babbie is such an excellent example that I have devoted most of the chapter to quotes from the book, which demonstrate her childlike quality of teasing playfulness in handling the short tempered Little Minister in a way that won his heart and soul. To quote from the book:

Babbie had tricked the Little Minister into helping her escape through a line of soldiers by pretending to be his wife. Gavin was furious. “It was beautiful,” she exclaimed, clasping her hands merrily.

“It was iniquitous,” he answered. “And I, a minister.”

After listening to his scolding, Babbie’s face changed and she became as a child. “I am very sorry,” she said, as if he had caught her stealing jam. The hood had fallen back and she looked at him pleadingly. She had the appearance of one who was entirely in his hands.

“I do not understand you,” Gavin said weakly. Only a few hours ago you were a gypsy girl in a fantastic dress. Now you fling a cloak over your shoulders and become a fine lady. Who are you?”

Babbie answered mischievously, “Perhaps it is the cloak that has bewitched me.” She slipped out of it. “Ay” she said, as if surprised. “It was just the cloak that did it, for now I am a poor ignorant little lassie again. My goodness but clothes do make a difference to a woman.”

This was sheer levity, so the dignified minister walked away, but he was charmed.

A Word of Warning
When speaking to a man... take particular care that you do not wound him emotionally. By this I mean do not say or do anything that would make him feel guilty, ignorant, anxious, humiliated or inferior. Such feelings can be painful, sometimes injurious and will do nothing for either of you but put a wedge in your relationship. Avoid awakening these negative feelings in your husband, your children or anyone you are cultivating a relationship with. The only way we can help anyone to grow is to look to their better side and help them find happiness.